When you move to another country, you’re not just changing your address; you’re stepping into a world of different cultures, mindsets, laws, and social norms. And here’s the crucial part: it’s up to you to adapt and view this new country through the lens of “how things work here”. You’re entering a culture that existed long before you arrived and will continue long after you’re gone. So, whether you feel comfortable or uncomfortable, your personal opinion isn’t the priority. No culture is obligated to revolve around your individual preferences.
On the other side, it’s also common for people returning from exchange programs, internships, or work experiences abroad to find themselves unable to readapt to their home country. I include myself in that list, and from personal experience, I know how distressing reverse culture shock can be. Few people will truly understand you. Your horizons expand, you get used to a life that isn’t possible back home, and suddenly, that experience that was meant to be temporary opens up a world of possibilities incompatible with your old routine.
In this post, I’ll share what I’ve learned about this topic and what I’ve compiled from my experiences living in 6 countries (India, Egypt, Serbia, Switzerland, Ukraine, and South Africa) and traveling half the world.
What Exactly Is Culture Shock?
In practical terms, culture shock is an experience we face when we move to a cultural environment different from our own. It manifests as a feeling of personal disorientation combined with the stress of adapting to new social rules, customs, values, language, and forms of communication.
What Are the Symptoms of Culture Shock?
The symptoms of culture shock vary from person to person, depending on how accustomed one is to living abroad and interacting with people from different cultures. Some common symptoms include:
- Feelings of strangeness and not belonging to the new environment.
- Anxiety, frustration, and irritation due to misunderstandings caused by cultural differences.
- Loneliness, sadness, and boredom, coupled with homesickness for your country of origin.
- Difficulty sleeping.
- Loss of appetite in the face of new eating habits.
- Difficulty maintaining focus and concentration due to feelings of confusion.
- Feelings of insecurity about how to act and express yourself in daily life.
- Headaches, stomach aches, and other physical symptoms.
Phases of Culture Shock
The process of cultural adaptation typically occurs in phases, with varying duration and intensity for each individual. Throughout this process, your mood will fluctuate according to your feelings of inadequacy or familiarity with the new country’s culture, as well as with your length of stay.
Each phase of culture shock influences your perception of every experience you have and of the country you’re in. It’s one thing to travel as a tourist; it’s another to live there long enough to know the pros and cons that every country has. So, let’s look at each of these phases:
1. Honeymoon Phase
This is the phase of euphoria; everything is fascinating, and you’re immediately curious about the novelty of the new country. In this stage, it’s typically a tourist’s view, where the good side stands out in the first few days. However, even on a short trip, a simple gesture that’s normal for you might be obscene in the country you’re visiting, or ignoring certain local customs might cause awkwardness, offense, or lead to blunders. After the first misunderstanding, anxiety often kicks in.
2. Crisis or Hostility Phase
This is the actual culture shock phase, when you start facing difficulties and discomfort after the initial euphoria, accompanied by feelings of frustration, irritation, boredom, and even disappointment from perceived offenses. It’s normal to lose emotional control in this phase and even want to isolate yourself due to emotional exhaustion. This is when we find ourselves asking, “What am I doing here?” It’s also characterized by exaggerated criticism of the other culture and an idealization of your way of life.
3. Adjustment or Reorientation Phase
After the initial shocks, you begin to better understand the new social rules, customs, and norms of the new country. This is often the “now or never” phase, the moment you decide whether to “accept the challenge or go back home.” You gradually get used to what once seemed strange and start to loosen up. Finally, this is the phase where you begin to accept the local culture. Indeed, “that’s just how they are.” It’s simply different ways of perceiving the world and living life.
4. Adaptation Phase
After understanding the local culture, you gradually adapt and integrate into the new country. In this phase, you already feel like a local, having accepted and embraced the cultural differences that initially caused discomfort. At this point, you might even forget you’re a foreigner, behaving like a member of the society you now inhabit. This is when a strong sense of belonging emerges.
5. Reverse Culture Shock (Coming Home)
You return to your country of origin and may feel out of place in your old environment. There’s a sense of no longer belonging to your home country, and it’s normal to feel frustrated at not being understood by people who haven’t had similar experiences.
How to Deal with Culture Shock
Easier said than done! I’ve also had moments of frustration, anger, and anguish. There’s no single recipe for everyone; it’s a process that requires an open mind, patience, and flexibility to overcome cultural differences.
Before You Travel
- Research the culture of your destination country. Websites like CultureMee can be helpful. Also, inform yourself about local laws, traditions, customs, values, and history.
- Study culture map models and methodologies that serve as practical guides for interacting with other cultures in work, social, and personal life. I rely on the works of authors like Geert Hofstede and Erin Meyer.
- Learn the language of the country, especially for long stays. Speaking another language opens our minds to understanding how locals think and express themselves, including their unique nuances.
During Your Trip
- Be curious and observe people’s behavior, personal interactions, how they express themselves, and the nuances of the local culture. If you don’t understand something, ask questions.
- Prepare for the unfamiliar! Not everything boils down to right vs. wrong amidst different ways of seeing the world and doing things in ways you’re not used to.
- Adapt without losing your roots: Find a balance between the culture of your host country and your own. You can adapt without losing your essence.
Build Connections in Your New Country
- Participate in local activities, events, festivals, celebrations, language and dance classes, learn local cuisine, and other activities that help you integrate into the new culture.
- Make friends with locals and with other foreigners living in your destination. Both can help build a support system and aid in adaptation. If it’s difficult to make local friends, Internations is an excellent alternative, as I found in Switzerland and South Africa.
- Share your culture to enrich the experience of locals and other foreigners interacting with you.
Take Care of Yourself on the Journey
- Be patient with adaptation! It’s a long process, and you’ll have good days and bad days. Recognize the challenge and the wonder of navigating another culture.
- Stay in touch with loved ones back home, as this is a great source of emotional support and comfort when needed.
- Set aside time for yourself for relaxation activities and hobbies that help you recover from the emotional drain of culture shock.
- Seek help if you need it when you feel sadness, anxiety, or frustration.
Observe Opportunities for Growth
- Don’t view culture shock as a problem. Treat it as a natural part of learning and personal growth, an opportunity to expand your horizons.
- Learn from mistakes and treat them as opportunities to better understand cultural differences. Maintain a good sense of humor in the face of misunderstandings, gaffes, and conflicts that are part of the adaptation process in another culture.
What About Reverse Culture Shock?
Reverse culture shock is the phase many expats face upon returning to their home country after a period of living abroad. Even short but intense experiences can cause reverse culture shock; two weeks in a country like India might consume more adrenaline than two years in Switzerland.
Upon returning home, what was once familiar now feels strange. You might feel that you’ve changed after your experiences abroad, but your old environment and the people around you remain as they were in the past.
How to Deal with Reverse Culture Shock
- Acknowledge your feelings. It’s normal to feel lost, frustrated, nostalgic, and out of place, like a fish out of water. Don’t blame yourself for these feelings. Accepting reverse shock is the first step to overcoming it.
- Be prepared for changes. Even in your home country and the city where you’ve lived for years, things might have changed while you were away. And you’ve changed too! Be prepared to see your old environment with “new eyes” and understand that our expectations don’t always match reality.
- Manage expectations. Your family and friends might not understand your culture shock experiences or how much you’ve changed during your journey. Don’t expect them to be interested in all your adventures or for everything to go back to exactly how it was. The once familiar place might feel strange and outside your current expectations.
- Stay in touch with family, friends, and seek out people who have had similar experiences abroad.
- Share your experiences with interested people. Try to contextualize your stories so they are understandable to those who haven’t lived the same reality abroad. Share photos, videos, cuisine, lessons learned, and content that reflects your experiences. This is one of the reasons I started publishing travel content online.
- Adopt a tourist’s perspective in your city and the places you visit to see them with fresh eyes. Visit new places, be open to new activities, and rediscover what you love most about your homeland.
- Plan your future and extract learnings from the experiences that transformed you. Think about how you can apply the skills you gained in your country and never settle. Don’t waste time defining your next goals! If the desire to leave the country is stronger than staying, it’s necessary to develop strategies for a migratory process.
- Maintain a healthy routine with exercise and a balanced diet, and seek professional support if needed, as reverse culture shock can also be draining.
Remember that each person reacts differently to culture shocks, so don’t be too hard on yourself and allow yourself to live the adventure of adaptation.
Moving abroad is a reprogramming of your daily life, regardless of the country or city you end up in. The process of adapting to another culture is already stressful, and when we underestimate the challenge or refuse to accept it, we simply hit a wall. As a passage from Seneca’s letter to his friend Lucilius aptly describes: “A journey has never rendered a judgment or undone a mistake.” The same goes for emigrating. In the same letter from Seneca, the following passage is left for reflection:
“Imagine you are in Athens, in Rhodes. Simply choose any other city. How will the customs of that place affect you? You carry your own.”
Have you ever had a culture shock experience you’d like to share?
Originally posted 2021-02-28 21:34:22.
